Dear Greg Jennings: More TD’s, Less Commercials

Dear Greg Jennings,

This is an open letter to stop filming commercials and start scoring touchdowns! …Or at least use the skills you showcase in your commercials. (We’ll get to that in a bit) Everyone who participates in Fantasy Football is completely flummoxed by your recent inability to score fantasy points. Yes, I know Aaron Rodgers isn’t slinging it like he did back in 2011 when you guys went 15-1 and were super buds, but still, I would greatly appreciate it if you could pull him aside and ask him, why he likes Jordy Nelson (17 pts.), Jermichael Finley (16 pts.), James Jones (19 pts.) and Donald Driver (8 pts.) so much more than you. (6 pts.) I’m sure Aaron will be a good sport about it and try to get you the ball a little more. After all, you are Greg Jennings!
Greg Jennings

Greg Jennings Stats
Year Rec Yards TD
2009 68 1113 4
2010 76 1265 12
2011* 67 949 9

*= Played in only 13 games last season.

Now I know you recently just suffered a heart breaking loss to the Seattle Seahawks, catch or no catch at the end, let’s just review your game real quick. Yes, you probably scored a deep touchdown that was a missed call by the referee. It happens, and frequently throughout this game, considering the final play. Let’s ignore that though, you were targeted the most of any Green Bay wide receiver during this last game. Greg, you were targeted 10 times and you had six catches. Come on Greg! 60% reception rate? That is pretty bad for a number one wide receiver. I simply expect bette, even if we both know that you really scored a touchdown in the fourth quarter.

So what should you do? Well I think this familiar YouTube video summarizes my expectations pretty nicely . You know…that carrying the whole team on your back part, not the broken leg part….Now while I know you haven’t been exactly lighting it up in fantasyland, (6 points!?) I think you need to get back to basics. Using that big bed will score you tons of fantasy points (the video above). Although, you did use it against the Patriots, and they are not exactly a lights out defense against the bed. I understand you might not be in it to win it for me as a fantasy owner, but think of your teammates, your coach, your family, Kalamazoo, Michigan and Bosco. You wouldn’t want to disappoint them as well, right?

So this week you have the short week to prepare for the New Orleans Saints. The Saints you say?! Dont worry Greg, Darren Sharper, one of the hardest hitting safeties in da league, has retired. You are pretty safe. The Saints are not the defensive team they were in recent previous years. You heard about the bounty scandal right? Yeah, well that is all over now and the Saints’ defense is looking very tempting for passing offenses. The Redskins’ wide receivers chalked up two touchdowns and 235 yards in Week One. The Panthers’ wide receivers had 200 yards and zero touchdowns in Week Two and the Chiefs’ wide receivers posted 117 yards and zero touchdowns in Week Three. The Panthers and the Chiefs don’t have Aaron Rodgers as a starting quarterback. And while times have been tough for Aaron and the Packers’ offensive line (who have given up an NFL leading 16 sacks in the first three weeks) expect Rodgers to light up this secondary. He can’t do it alone though right? Thats where you come in! Catch the ball and run towards the end zone! It’s amazing what Old Spice commercials make you forget.

So let’s review the New Orleans defense just for fun, even though I know you have all of this memorized already. The Saints run a base 4-3 defense. They are currently the last ranked defense in total yardage. They have given up a total of 1432 yards through the air and on the ground. They allow an average of 477.3 yards per game. An average of 262.3 yards of which are through the air and an average of 215 yards of which are on the ground. They have allowed 102 points this season in three games and allow an average of 34 points per game. To say that the Saints defense is soft is a massive understatement. The Saints’ defense might be the easiest defense you play the entire year. Quite simply, you need to get it done Sunday against the Saints. The Packers’Offensive line should be able to get it together for this one and a shootout of massive proportions between the Saints and the Packers should ensue. What does that mean!? … Terrible fantasy defense points for the Pack and Saints but a big fantasy day for certain fantasy wide receivers. Mainly you. I anticipate that your injury is fully healed considering your performance on Monday and I have to assume that you are still raging mad about the Seahawks winning that game. So I’m guessing you are going to go off big time. I also think that your super pal Jordy Nelson will draw most of the double coverages from the Saints since no one forgot about his deep-threat ability that he showcased last year. Leaving you with a majority of the targets and consequently a majority of the points.

So thank you for listening to me ramble Greg, I appreciate it. Go score some touchdowns and please stop being outscored by Tom Crabtree, the other Packers tight end who no one knows. It is just flat out depressing.

Thank you Greg.

Ken Reiser

Gridiron Experts Writer
Greg Jennings Fantasy Owner 2012
0-3 in the Writers League (Last Place)
Member of the Greg Jennings needs to score points so I can get out of last place anonymous group

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