101 NFL Fan Checklist For 2011

Alright Football fans, Gridiron Experts has compiled a 101 NFL Fan “Things to-do list” for you. If you can’t crack 50 on this list maybe you should start watching tennis!

101 NFL Fan Checklist For 2011

1. Use company resources to research your fantasy football team.
2. Spill nacho cheese on either the couch or floor and blame it on your buddy.
3. Over think your fantasy line-up in September.
4. Get pissed off at Chris Collinsworth after he says something stupid about your team
5. Use a sick day to either watch your team or nurse a hangover from watching a game.
6. Neglect one of the following from over watching NFL football: Wife, Children or pet
7. Yell at your TV more
8. Hate your quarterback at some point this season
9. Freak out after seeing the play clock hit zero and the referee doesn’t call delay of game.
10. Watch a kicker cost you a fantasy win
11. Take part in a failed high-five or fist-pump
12. Get less sleep on Saturday nights
13. Flip off your neighbors after they bang on the walls from you getting football rowdy
14. Watch highlights from a game you just watched
15. Read Gridiron Experts more
16. Lose a fantasy week from a last-minute substitution
17. Put on a little weight
18. Get pissed off at Joe Buck after he says something stupid
19. Rant to your friends about the new kick-off rule!
20. Send the text: “Your team sucks” at some point this season to a friend.
21. Watch an injury shake up your fantasy league
22. Eat BBQ in the cold
23. Laugh at a NFL Beer commercial
24. Get jacked up after a big hit!
25. Let your cable or satellite provider mess with you one morning.
26. Get the urge to play madden 11
27. Predict an upset win
28. Eat something spicy
29. Flow Gridiron Expert on Twitter
30. Make beer your dinner one night
31. Watch Mike Vick do something amazing
32. Watch Mike Vick do something stupid
33. Let your rival team piss you off
34. Promise someone you will do something later while watching football
35. Watch an awkward national anthem being sung
36. See a muffed punt, and then do your best “butt-head” impression and say: “Muff”
37. Let a missed extra point start a conversation about how much you hate kickers
38. Watch a bad defensive game in it’s entirety
39. See a tight end if you know what I mean
40. Get mad at a guy wearing a giant cheese-head
41. Take a half time nap
42. Trade a fantasy player
43. Eat a cheese-steak
44. Yell “Challenge that” after a play
45. Break out a throwback jersey
46. Eat a Deep Dish Pizza
47. Take a nap in between a game
48. Paint your face
49. Boo an Eagles Fan ( if you are an Eagles fan throw a snow ball at Santa Claus)
50. Text the phrase: “I hate fantasy football” after a heartbreaking loss.
51. Use a sick day before a big game
52. Get caught talking at work about football
53. Use your hands when talking about a great game
54. Buy a new NFL hat
55. Mock a friends fantasy team, use the phrase: “what we’re you thinking?” and then laugh in their face!
56. Make a bold statement that your friends will hold you to all season.
57. Make a special pre-game meal for luck
58. Swear that you’ll never wear a specific article of clothing after a terrible loss
59. Overreact in the first quarter
60. Get your hands on some Jambalaya
61. Go to an NFL game
62. Make a new friend when tailgating
63. Get pissed off at Troy Aikman after he says something stupid
64. Predict a penalty before the ref speaks
65. Yell at a QB to throw to your specific fantasy player
66. Read Gridiron Experts more
67. Make a half time beer run
68. Put a NFL decal on something you own
69. Watch NFL replay
70. Record a great game and watch it again
71. Make a long shot Las Vegas bet
72. Use any Simpson’s reference during a NFL game that gets a laugh “Ohh The Denver Broncos”
73. Point out an idiot in the crowd
74. Point out a hot babe in the crowd
75. Make fun of the way Al Michaels says the word: “Huge”
76. Make fun a fantasy opponent’s line-up only to get rolled by luck
77. Re-name your pet after an NFL star for one Sunday
78. Get up early to check the injury report
79. Watch a ref blow a game
80. Miss a big play while you’re in the washroom
81. Stock up on Pepto Bismol
82. Almost lose your lunch after a gruesome injury
83. Make a Turducken on Thanksgiving
84. Invest too much time in a Fantasy Football trade
85. Put booze in coffee (only on Sundays, you drunk! -lol)
86. Carve an NFL pumpkin
87. Talk about how great you were at Tecmo Bowl
88. Join Gridiron Experts Facebook fan page
89. Ask for a NFL related X-Mas gift
90. Pick a new pre-game “pump up” song to get you in the mood
91. Research a 5th string WR on your teams depth chart
92. Make a touchdown dance and break it out after a huge win
93. Scream “Pass interference” at your TV
94. Use your IPhone to settle a NFL related argument
95. Get pissed off with a caller on NFL Talk Radio
96. Cheer against the teams in your teams division
97. Buy an NFL cheerleader calendar
98. Shotgun a beer (hey, we’re running out of things to do here)
99. Pretend you got something in your eye, after your team misses the playoffs
100. Watch a classic Football movie mid-week
101. Insert your 101 _________________

Twitter follow: @GridironExperts

hot photo: SI.com

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10 Ways to Screw Up Your Fantasy Football Draft

A fantasy draft is where you set the tone for the entire season. If you mess is up, you will be playing catch up either through trades are scouring the waiver wire for roster help all year. You need to have a strategy or game-plan to what you want to do, along with a few deep sleepers for the important late rounds.

The following are 10 ways to completely miss you mark on draft day!

10. Brag and Tell Everyone How Great you are at Fantasy Football
To jinx your season with running your mouth at the draft just makes you the number one target.  People start to cheer when you lose and ignore trade offers. Do the victory dance after you win it all, not before the season starts.

9. Show Up Late
A good rule of thumb is to be early, talk to the players in the draft and find out who people like or are leaning on. If your opponents are clueless you gain an early hint to how the draft may go down, giving you even more time when springing for deep sleepers. But overall, showing up late just as the draft starts can create that rushed feeling we all hate.

8. Print-Off a Ton of Fantasy Boards and Stats
When you’re on the clock, you need to be organized and aware of whats available. Do not clutter your brain with stats and schedules, keep it simple, make one board that is clean and organized…you’d be surprised how well you do.

7. Pass on Talent Because of Bye Weeks
There’s nothing worse than having 2 RB’s on the same bye week, but to draft a player purely based on the fact that he has the same bye week as your other starter is not smart either. Don’t let bye weeks rule the world, if you really want a player, take him! Don’t let minor things like bye weeks ruin your chance at a championship. Remember there are no bye weeks in the playoffs!

6. Drink your face off
Everybody loves draft day, but if your head’s not in it, you’ll end up with a handful of bums and kickers.

5. Draft your Favorite Players
People tend to pick players based on teams they love and avoid players they hate. Unless you like wasting money, try to draft the best team and cheer for your favorite players on the side. The Cowboys, Eagles and Patriots are great fantasy teams despite all the haters.

4. Underestimate the time of a draft
Some people try to squeeze a fantasy draft in between work or things to do. If you’re rushed you’ll make poor decisions.

3. Obsess over Running Backs
We all know how important a stud RB is, but Quarterbacks and Receivers are just as important. Try to take the best available player; you don’t need 3-4 superstar RB’s with Rex Grossman and two Cleveland Brown’s WR’s.

2. Over Think your Picks
Some people study their brains out trying to find sleepers, and end up overlooking quality fantasy players. Keep your sleepers locked up until the last half of the draft. Don’t be the guy who reaches on a rookie too early or a player on a bad team.

1. Bring your Girlfriend or Wife to your draft
Circle the day on the calendar and tell her you’ll hang out later. There’s nothing worse than getting looks from across the room while trying to make fantasy decisions. We all know the draft is key to a great fantasy season, so leave the drama at home.

Of course, if your girlfriend or wife is in the pool then consider yourself the luckiest guy alive.

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Super Bowl Party Games!

Are you hosting a Super Bowl Party? Want to put a little money on the game with your friends, but tired of the traditional “Super Bowl Squares”? Gridiron Experts has a poker game that is fun for all that we’d love to share with you. This game can be customized to playing for fun, drinks, or some big bucks.

What you’ll need: a deck of cards (maybe two decks if you have more than 9 people playing)

Object of the Game: To score the most points from kickoff to the last play of the game.

Prep work: You’ll need to do a little work before you can play, but it’s worth it. Find a deck of cards that has room to write on each card (or write on paper then tape them to the cards). Then assign each card with a different situation that could happen in the game. This game is totally customizable but we made it for you….

Rules: Every person is dealt 5 cards. Each time a players card happens in the game, he or she calls it out and places the card face up on the table. That player scores their points but does not pick up another card until the following commercial break. If a player can use all 5 cards before a commercial break they are awarded a 5 point bonus.

At a commercial break any player that did not play a card can “draw” up to 2 new cards. For those players that played cards, they replace the number of cards they played but are not allowed to trade in the remaining cards in their hand.

A player has until the next snap to play their card before it’s too late, if they don’t call it out the points are not awarded.

For any cards that you have to “spot” something on the field, another person must agree that they saw that moment of the game for the player to receive points for the “spot” card.

Have Fun!!

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Costume Ideas for NFL Cheerleaders

You lie to your girlfriend or wife every Sunday when the camera man shows the smoking hot cheerleaders jumping around. You say things like “She’s not that hot” or “Get back to the game already”, something… anything to avoid a fight and end up sleeping on the couch. If you’re at your buddies house or in your man-cave (“NO MA’AM” for life) then you are missing the game while you pause live TV to rewind and watch the girls again.

Most NFL Cheerleaders are hotter than many of todays celebrities. While the girls of the NFL are all smiles, dancing and entertaining on the sidelines, famous cover girls are drunk, throwing beer bottles at photographers.

As much are the NFL pretends like sex doesn’t sell, the money these girls bring in from photo’s and calendars is worth it’s weight in gold. So why on Halloween,  the one day of the year when a girl (any girl) can get dressed up as slutty as possible without anybody saying a thing, do we see the most boring unflattering costumes imaginable. Every year NFL cheerleaders wear costumes that were G-Rated, at best. I’m not saying that the NFL goes out and borrows a bunch of stripper outfits (although ratings would cause mass blackouts and possibly stop the earth from spinning) but it is possible to make an outfit sexy, without causing grandpa’s heart to stop.

For those girls who have  no idea what they’re going to wear for Halloween and for the NFL cheerleaders that can pick their costumes, we here at Gridiron Experts have listed our favorites:

She’s the Boss

She’s in charge, in a costume that calls all the shots. She has a gun (or guns) and has never looked so good in a uniform. She’ll be on the lookout for  consoled weapons, catching illegal activity and nabbing bad guys.

The Work Uniform

The everyday outfit…but slutty? It works.

These are great examples of how a simple costume can be a big hit at the party or on the NFL sidelines by simply removing a article of clothing, example the chef’s pants

Superhero

If girls knew how stupid guys are over movies and superheros, then costumes like these could control the world.

Sweet and Innocent

She’ll trick you into buying cookies or paying her way through school.

Borderline Crazy

There is a huge percentage of women in the world that are borderline crazy, now they can dress like it.

From Out Of Town

Get called an idiot in another language for a change

HAPPY HALLOWEEN From Gridiron Experts!

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Worst Way To Lose

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NFL Weekend News

• Jake Delhomme- QB, Cleveland Browns
  The Cleveland Browns have agreed to terms with QB Jake Delhomme on a two-year deal. The big question now is what to do with Brady Quinn and all of these QB’s.
• Ray Edwards – DE, Minnesota Vikings
  There is a report that the Eagles are interested in Vikings restricted free agent DE Ray Edwards, who has a tender of a 1st round pick
• Chris Baker – TE, Seattle Seahawks
  The Seahawks are about to sign TE Chris Baker to a two-year, $4.75 million deal. He has little to no fantasy value being behind John Carlson.
• Roy Williams – S, Cincinnati Bengals
  SS Roy Williams has with the Bengals.
• Larry Foote – LB, Detroit Lions
  The Steelers will host free agent LB Larry Foote on Monday.

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What’s Plax up to These Days?

Plaxico Burress was jailed in 2009 for possession of a firearm. For those of you who are unsure of the scenario, not only did he possess a firearm, he shot himself in the leg with it inside the Latin Quartier night club. It’s been a while since the Gridiron crew has even mentioned him, so let’s take a sneak peek into what’s going on in his life.

Prior to the Super Bowl many of us witnessed a CBS special interview of Plaxico led by Bill Cohwer, in which Plax expressed his remorse for his actions, not only for himself, but also for the problems he had caused the Giants organization.  He describes his actions as a “selfish decision” and goes onto say that in the in the future he “wants to be a better brother, friend, and football player”.

More recently, this past January Plaxico was just denied a work release by the New York Department of Correctional Services. Under this rationale the corrections department chose not release him: “At no time did you report this incident to local law enforcement. As such, it is determined that you must serve a greater portion of your sentence prior to consideration for potential participation in the temporary release program”. Manhattan’s D.A. Cyrus Vance Jr. supports the decision of correctional services:  “The defendant took an upholstered, loaded pistol into a crowded nightclub, accidentally firing it with one hand while holding his drink in the other. This extreme and reckless disregard for safety is what New York’s gun laws were designed to prevent.”

Finally most recently, Plaxico and his gorgeous wife have been hit with a $3.3 million foreclosure law suit on their beautiful home in Lighthouse Point, Florida. Don’t fret though folks the 6,872-square-foot waterfront home isn’t his main residence, he still owns a massive $1.5 million estate in New Jersey.

Arguably making one of the biggest “bone-head” moves in the NFL within the past few years, Plaxico is scheduled to be released from prison some time in 2011. He would like to get back into the league but currently at 33 years old the chances for the former star are dwindling. But let’s face it; if he can’t find work in the NFL he can always pitch a bid to sponsor the NRA with the likes of: Bears DT Tommie Harris, and NBA stars Gilbert Arenas, and Javaris Crittenton.

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NFL Free Agent Signings & Visits

• The Cleveland Browns have signed tight end Ben Watson to a three-year deal worth $12 million, including $6.35 million guaranteed. Watson, the former Patriot was one of our top 5 sleeper free agents and we feel this is a great addition for the Browns. Cleveland was missing a weapon in the tight end position after trading away Kellen Winslow last year. Slowing and quietly the Browns are taking form, the NFL draft should be interesting to see which direction Mike Holmgren wants to go with this club, improve the defense or play for the future with young offensive talent.
• Free agent LaDainian Tomlinson left Vikings headquarters without a contract Thursday evening. The poor guy is intent on signing with a team that will make him more than a number 2 guy, good luck
• Comcast Sports Net Philadelphia reports the Seahawks are interested only in Kevin Kolb, not Donovan McNabb. The Eagles are known for making back up QB’s look amazing and should consider a high draft pick for Kolb. A couple years back the Eagles got a high 2nd round pick for A.J Feely, after trading him to the Dolphins. He was a bust and re-signed with the team a couple years later. Other Eagle news: Philadelphia has signed WR Hank Baskett to a one-year contract, Friday.
• Patriots re-signed RB Kevin Faulk to a one-year, $2 million contract, including a $1 million signing bonus.
• The Redskins are “very much interested” in signing free agent running back Larry Johnson, according to NFL Network’s Jason LaCanfora.

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Ohiocinco Doesn’t Call The Shots In Cincy

Chad Ohiocinco as stupid as that name is, can move boulders with the media and the fan base in Cincinnati. When he’s un-happy, the team plays poorly and the fans get ticked off. When Chad’s goofing around and getting his way, the Bengals are contenders.

This offseason, number 85 has made a small request to his front office; add veteran wide receiver Terrell Owens to the Bengals Orange and Black…he (for now) has been ignored.

The Bengals instead have gone out and signed a different WR option in Antonio Bryant, who has agreed to a four-year deal with the Cincinnati Bengals Wednesday. Dancing with the Stars will distract the unpredictable big mouth, and only time will tell if he cares or not, but if you ignore the wishes of your bratty kid and go out and buy him the wrong action figure….odds are he kicks and screams for the one he wanted.

Antonio Bryant had career highs with 83 catches for 1,248 yards and seven touchdowns in 2008 with Tampa Bay.

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