Overpriced NFL Items
I’m always looking for a deal no matter what time of year it is. I buy shorts in the winter when stores have blowout sales, and hoodies in the summer when nobody wants them because it’s too hot. I also like shopping for things online as I’ve learned how to find promo codes and comparison shop with other websites. That’s code for: I’m too lazy to go to the shopping mall.
Lately, Amazon has been my go to for finding great deals. I trust Amazon and believe they have the fastest and cheapest prices on shipping. Most of the time shipping is free, which is actually something most people overlook and don’t factor into the cost of the item.
The following are seven random NFL items that I found that you’d never pay for in a million years. These sellers are definitely out of their minds.
7. NFL Team Classic Sofas
What’s crazy, however, is the fact that in the seller details it lists the NFL sofa as being a fully licensed product by the National Football League, which is mind blowing considering how lazy of a design this is.
It Would Be Cool If: The whole pattern of the sofa was the team logo, like these little kid pajamas (pic). That would at least be an interesting look.
There are also additional benefits to my suggested busy team logo look, as it could be helpful if you or your friends spilled chili or beer on the sofa; the pattern would be so busy that stains wouldn’t stand out as much. As you’re reading this I guess you imagine I spill a lot of food on myself and have learned this life hack by wearing nothing but Fat-Guy Hawaiian shirts. The truth is no; I’m not disgusting, but I do have kids who spill things regularly.
Surprised By: The fact this sofa exists.
Rather Have: The kid pajamas (link)
6. NFL Team Pool Tables
Has it come to this? Are we just taking random items and slapping an NFL team logo on it? I don’t know about you, but
if when my kids grow up and move out of the house, I’ll be creating an awesome man cave. If I were to ever buy a pool table, I’d get one that’s high quality and decorate the room around it with NFL memorabilia instead. But hey, that’s just me, some people may see this pool table and think it would be perfect for their place.
It is Officially Licensed by National League Football, which means the logos and design aren’t cheap knockoffs and that the NFL has approved it.
It Would Be Cool If: You could pick NFL teams to represent the balls like Raiders are the eight ball, Eagles are the green ball, Steelers are the yellow ball, etc.
I’d Much Rather Have: Framed NFL Mini Helmet collection (pic). I used to collect all the NFL helmets. The problem was, in my old place the sun would shine in through the window and the colors started to fade. They don’t look as sharp as they once did. I have the macro-collection, which are a little smaller than the traditional NFL Mini Helmets.
— Mike Rigz (@MikeRigz) September 11, 2014
Dug through my twitter feed and found my collection of NFL team helmets. Kind of cool, right?
5. Green Bay Packers Tailgate Table
Let me reenact how this will go down:
- You set up your tailgate area and unfold this flimsy NFL 8 foot table with its borderline plastic legs.
- You have a couple of beverages and begin to throw the ball around.
- Your buddy reaches out for a pass (while still holding his beer) stumbles and lands on the table.
- He crashes into the table and bends one of the legs.
- You try to bend it back into place, but the table is permanently wonky.
- Later, you destroy the table in an angry rage. Fire may be involved.
4. San Francisco 49ers Pandora 14kt Gold Football Helmet Charm
What the hell is someone supposed to do with this thing?
This is not an Amazon product; this is a product you can buy at NFLShop. In the description it tries to call you out as a poser if you don’t own one:
“Prove you are the #1 San Francisco 49ers fan with this Football Helmet charm from Pandora. Constructed from 14kt gold, this charm features a vibrant San Francisco 49ers logo, so you can add a nice touch of team spirit to any outfit. It’s the perfect accessory to wear to a game or any time you feel like representing your San Francisco 49ers in a classy way. NFL Shop is your source for officially licensed San Francisco 49ers gear.”
What a piece of crap.
3. Hand Crafted Leather Team Jackets
Does this come with $1,000 in the pocket? This jacket is made by a company called “Affordable Family Clothing,” that’s ironic.
Is it me, or does the Patriots guy look like he stinks like cigarettes and bad aftershave?
I could be wrong; beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Someone may see these NFL leather jackets as the perfect way to show off their love for their team while also staying warm for the winter. I see these jackets as a gift that would be better suited for my father. I’m not sure how much leather jackets cost, but either way, I prefer the jersey/hoodie look.
I’d Rather Have A much cheaper, more stylish jacket. The leather is by far a thicker and warmer material, but you can still get a pretty solid NFL team jacket at NFLShop.
As I said in the intro, I’m pretty good at finding promo codes, and I have a tip for anyone reading this article on their computer: add the Chrome Extension “HONEY”. Click on the Honey button during checkout and Honey will automatically apply coupon codes to your shopping cart, getting you the best deal.
2. NFL Team 40-Inch Rectangular Stained Glass Billiard Table Light
Yuck. I’m at a loss for words. I guess if you’re a megaball winner, and you’re going to get the pool table at the start of this article, you’d have to throw in this tacky stained glass billiard light.
It Would Be Cool If: …I got nothing.
1. NFL Team Guitars
Is it wrong for me to say I want one?!?
This thing is awesome! I would lose my mind if I saw a fan in the Oakland Raiders black hole ripping a solo on this guitar after an Oakland touchdown. I mean, the paint job alone is pretty sweet.
In all fairness, I’ve fallen victim to the sex appeal of this item. I’m sure it plays like crap and has like $50 worth of actual guitar parts in it. Still, it’s worth a laugh.
Click here to see more NFL guitars.