Fantasy Football Loser Ideas
The Beer Boy
I wanted to use another five letter word that started with B, but we’ll keep it kind of classy in this article. The beer boy is to be dressed in any outfit that the champion finds pleasing during the draft the following season. While in this outfit at the draft, the beer boy is responsible for buying and serving all drinks to other owners while sticking names on the draft board for the entire draft.
We use shiny objects such as medals and trophies to reward the champion in sports. So why not punish the owner who finished in last with the same thing. The winner from the previous year is allowed to pick any piercing he or she desires, and the owner who finishes last gets to pick only the location of the piercing. “You will feel a tiny pinch.”
Open Mic Comedy
Is there anything better than watching a friend make a complete fool of himself in front of a bunch of strangers and a few close friends? Certain things are funnier with friends, and this idea is hilarious for everyone. To some degree everyone thinks they are funny, but this is a great reality check and amazing night out with your friends as you watch the worst owner make a fool of himself doing stand-up comedy at a comedy club.
Every year you see dedicated firefighters and women near a busy stoplight asking for donations. So in this punishment, the owner must buy a very revealing firewoman costume and wear it by the most active stoplight in the town/city. They will hold up a large sign that says something along the lines of “I suck at Fantasy Football.” While working the corner he or she must try and get donations from anyone looking to help this poor soul get any advice possible. The money he or she raises will be donated to the league’s choosing.
How many people remember taking the SAT’s? Now how many people remember finishing them and saying never again will I have to endure something so horrible again. Well, think again. The owner must apply and take the SAT’s and pay for everything that is included. They must show proof of being there and finish with at least a 700 on the SAT’s or he or she must take every owner to the bar for at least one drink. While at the SAT’s they must wear any outfit picked out by the league champ.
If this one is a mystery I can’t tell you what is in the bag, but I can give you the idea. Each owner writes a punishment on a piece of paper. So if there are ten teams, then only the owner who finished in last doesn’t submit a punishment, leaving nine pieces of paper in the bag. The punishments can be as cruel as you want, but remember you may finish in last next year. Each owner reaches in the bag and whatever he or she pulls out is the punishment they get to do to the owner who finished last.
The NFL Combine
When we think of funny NFL Combine pictures, Tom Brady’s has to come to mind. So in this punishment the owner must go through the entire NFL combine process. From receiving a physical from a licensed doctor to the embarrassing photo in underwear, to the actual drills. To help, go here for all the combine drills. Keep track of each owners time and throughout the years reward for best drill times and punish for worst times.
There is nothing more embarrassing than finishing last in your fantasy football league. So just imagine a constant reminder permanently inked to your skin for the rest of your life. Seriously this exists and to prove it,
Seriously, this is hardcore and does exist. Let me prove it, check out this video.
The owner who finishes last must get a tattoo of anything the champion from the current year desires. The owner who finished last is only allowed to pick the location, and he or she must pay for the tattoo.
Sports Illustrated Body Issue Calendar
The Sports Illustrated Body Issue magazine has been marveled at since it started. So in this punishment the loser must recreate 12 photos from the current year of the Body Issue and turn the photos into a calendar for all league members. The photos must be high quality and extremely accurate. The loser must pay for the calendars and if necessary a photographer.
Some people will understand, and others won’t.
For anyone who has seen How I Met Your Mother, they will understand what the Playbook is and how hilarious this punishment will be. For anyone who doesn’t know or needs a refresher look at this video here.
The league champ is allowed to pick any of the many ideas from The Playbook, and the owner who finished in last must do it. If he or she is not successful in achieving the ultimate goal of The Playbook, then the owner must buy every owner a drink right before the last call.
Avoid This Crap in 2016
None of these horribly funny fantasy football punishments should happen to you. Follow me on Twitter at @MitchellRenz365 and subscribe to Gridiron Experts for the best insider fantasy football advice. Also, be proactive and pick your championship trophy instead.